A Good Dose of Grad School Rambling ... and a Weekend Outfit

This past week and weekend was quite busy as you can probably tell from my lack of blog entries and my neglect of responding to all of your comments. I do apologize and want you, dear readers, to know that I read every single comment and I promise to respond to you throughout the day. Last week was one of those weeks that I had approximately 20 different things on my "To Do" list that were priority because of deadlines. In addition, I spent two days at the NYPL hidden from the internet and any remaining social life I might have so that I could do some work. It's been a week of work, work and more work ... and I have to say that I'm feeling mighty lonely because of it. 

A few years ago I laughed at comic strip that depicted a young PhD student just entering his program. Throughout the strip he kept telling his friends that he couldn't go out because he was just too busy with school work. When he finally defended his dissertation and was ready to return to the world with a PhD in hand all of his friends had disappeared, leaving him alone to start his social life all over again. I swore that this would never happen to me and made an effort to go out as much as I could for the first two years of my PhD studies. This soon gave way as I immersed myself deeper and deeper into my studies and turned my attention to "my career." Grad school is a lonely path and unless you make some friends in your program often times you will find that people in your social sphere will stop asking you to go out, they'll get married and have kids, or they'll move away. When you're ready to go out again there isn't anyone there and, like me, you'll suddenly find yourself without a social group. Why not make friends in my PhD program? 1. Many of the people in my program are way younger than me, and 2. we just don't have anything in common except that we are all Art Historians. My interests and their interests stop at the museum.

NYC isn't the most conducive to making friends. Why not go out to club nights? Very simply put all Goth/Industrial/EBM/etc. nights start no earlier than 11:00 pm and don't really get started until midnight. Now this may not sound so bad to all of you 20 somethings, but for this pushing 40 year old who busts her ass all week it is quite an inconvenience. I had all good intentions on going out this Saturday night to go to a club that was celebrating a local DJ's 20th anniversary spinning Goth here in NYC. I was up at 6:00 am that morning to take my History of Illustration students to the NYPL to see some really amazing books and prints in their Print Collection (more on that in my next post). By the time I got home I was EXHAUSTED. I wished that the dance night would start much earlier, say 9:00, but alas it didn't. sigh .... I was in bed by the time the doors were open. Sad.

Needless to say, I'm feeling mighty lonely in this great, big city that has been my home for 39 years (minus two years that I lived in Salem, MA). Do any of you over 35 year olds feel like this in your home town? Do you feel like meeting people and making friends is almost impossible? It just seems like when you hit a certain age people are too wrapped up in their careers, themselves, or their families to want to have external friendships. I know that I'm guilty of holing up in the library to study and work. I know that I've been "absent" from the world ... but there's got to be a way to have a social life as an older Goth without always needing to go to clubs all the time. There must be another way.

Alas, I am rambling too much ... let's get on to Sunday's outfit. Sunday was my self-imposed day off from work to spend time with Ed. We ended up going to a mall in New Jersey so that I could try on rain coats, none of which were fabulous enough to buy. The good news is that I'm actually closer to being a misses XL. All of the women's sizes were just too boxy and big on me! HUZZAH! Unfortunately, many of the misses XLs weren't quite roomy enough ... I am once again between sizes, not that I'm complaining or anything. ;)

In the evening we went to my mother-in-law's to celebrate her birthday with Chinese food, ice cream cake and the Oscars. Must see movies: The Artist, Hugo, and Anonymous. Any opinions on them?

I wore my wine velvet skirt with the diagonal tiers that are trimmed in lace and the top that I featured in my Monthly Homework Assignment for January, Snow and Ice. The skirt still fits, albeit loosely ... the blouse however is a whole other story. It's way too big on me and the only way to get more use out of it is to belt it with my cincher belt, which is also loose on me! The belt itself is fitting without any stretch in the elastic! I knew that I should have bought the smaller size, but that was a month ago and I really didn't have the foresight to know just how much weight I would actually lose this month!

I wore my knee-high Doc Martins and thick socks and no stockings. Sometimes a gal needs a break from the stockings, tights, and pantyhose! ;) The jewelry that I'm wearing was a gift from Ed for Yule. The earrings and necklace are from the new Alchemy Gothic line, Coffin Drop Cameo.

I decided to break my fashion rut by spending some time on my makeup. I'm wearing Manic Panic's "Love Color" in Wildfire and MAC's Black Tied Velvet eyeshadow. I used the Manic Panic eyeshadow both wet and dry in order to get a nice, dark, defined look that gently fades as it moves outwards. I rimmed my eyes with TokiDoki's black glitter liner and drew on my eyebrows with Revlon's Stiletto liquid liner in Blackest Black. My lipstain is from Revlon's "Just Bitten" line in Midnight.

Ah, my Ed! I'm happy to report that my hubby has also join us in Bat Fit and has lost 15 pounds. He and I are making right food decisions and cutting our portions. He's completely off the soda and I'm exercising. It's so much fun to have him on board, and it makes life for me extremely easy. Who knows where he's going to level out! All I have to say is that he's looking mighty fine -- he's thinning out and letting his hair hang long. RAWR! ;)

BAT FIT CHALLENGE: BRAG FEST INSTALLMENT

I'm an awesome caretaker and daughter. I make sure that my Mom is happy, healthy and safe every single day. I make sure that she gets to her doctors' appointments, that the chores are done at her house, that she's eating, and that she doesn't get too lonely. I visit with her every week and listen to her: her dreams, her fears, her happiness and her sorrow. She's truly my best friend and I would drop everything for my Mom if she needed me. 

THE RUN DOWN:

Skirt and Blouse: OneStopPlus.com

Boots: ShoeMall.com

Belt: Lane Bryant

Alchemy Gothic Jewelry: Gift from Ed

Batty Hair clips: Claire's